(Copyright 2018)
Greg and Lyn Wu* first learned about FamilyLife through attending an Art of Marriage® event in Beijing. Because of the difficulties they were facing in their marriage, particularly in their communication patterns, they didn’t want to go back after the first night. But God was at work in drawing them together and bringing about an amazing change in them. He began showing them their unhealthy patterns of blowing up at each other and allowed them to see that their anger and yelling were hurting themselves and their sons. A redemptive process took place.
A couple of years later, they were ready to do something to help other couples find the hope and restoration they had experienced. They received training to become speakers for FamilyLife. They started small, learning to deliver just one talk on a single topic at a time. When they began teaching on conflict, it felt like a risk because they didn’t want to dig up their past and expose their mistakes. But something surprising happened. “It actually brought healing when we exposed it to the light,” says Lyn. As they continued speaking at events and applying biblical marriage principles to their own lives, they were in awe of how God used them to have an impact on other couples.
The Wus have been humbled by how God has used them—even their mistakes and regrets—to reach other couples in China and to even lead some to Christ. One story of redemption stands out in Lyn’s mind.
Lily and Chen Huang* attended a Weekend to Remember® in 2015 on the edge of divorce. They had two boys together, but their relationship at home was characterized by verbal violence and shouting. After the event, they did divorce and Chen moved out. In the quiet of her new life, Lily began to consider her own heart and the harsh words she had used against her husband. Then she found out she was pregnant.
Through tears and uncertainty, Lily wondered what to do. She told Chen about the pregnancy. He felt guilty for leaving her on her own to raise their two boys and a baby, so he offered to come back to parent alongside her, but not as husband and wife.
In the months that followed, Lily and Chen were respectful with each other, but distant. Yet God continued to work. Lily got in touch with Lyn and began communicating with her through a messaging app. Lyn encouraged her and prayed with her regularly. Eventually Lily and Chen began attending church and drew closer together.
One day Lily sent Lyn a message that said, “Please pray. We want to get remarried.” Greg and Lyn rejoiced when a few hours later Lily sent a picture of their marriage license.
It’s stories like this that amaze and energize the Wus as they continue reaching out to marriages despite the many challenges and the needs that seem overwhelming. And while they rejoice in the lives and marriages healed, they acknowledge that perhaps the biggest gift is the help they’ve received for their own family. And they have learned that even their past mistakes and brokenness can be redeemed and transformed into something beautiful and restorative as they pour their lives into others.
*Names have been changed